Shock and Aw Shucks
I thought we might have gained some awareness of the limits of this
sort of adventuring, but there we were again yesterday, bypassing the
UN and launching a unilateral, unprovoked strike. Despite the
vociferous protestations of Horton, the UN weapons inspector, the
United States employed an unmanned drone weapon against the Whoville
comet as it sped innocuously in its orbit between Mars and Jupiter. In
a press conference to announce the attack, Defense Secretary Donald
Rumsfeld declined to provide an estimate of casualties, but described
the unexpected magnitude of the blast with undisguised glee. Later this
evening, CNN will relay a scratchy recording of what is believed to be
an extremely distressed Mayor of Whoville, appealing for aid and a
cessation of hostilities.
Horton, of African descent and suspected of ties to the fugitive
terrorist Babar, is being held at Guantanamo until his threat to U. S.
security can be evaluated.
